March 2017 - Understanding the Complexity of Sex Trafficking

Diane Gordon from Present Age Ministries shared insight into Sex Trafficking.

 

Diane started out with some really tough statistics:

• ·         The Average Age of girls involved in sex trafficking is 12-14 years old
• ·         The life expectancy of those girls once they are involved is only 7 years, many succumb to suicide and drugs
• ·         Less than 2% of those involved are rescued, there is an estimated 100-300K victims in the US

Many girls are abused and then forced into sex trafficking, some are lured in through social media and then they are coerced into sex trafficking.  These men find the ‘gap’ in the girls life and fill it under false promises.  Charlotte is the number one city in NC for sex trafficking and in the top 7 in the country.  Our interstates make it easy for the predators to move about.

Diane also shared what we can look for to help identify girls in need:

• ·         Older man with a younger woman
• ·         He’s speaking for her
• ·         She doesn’t know where she is or where she is going
• ·         She doesn’t know what day it is
• ·         She has no personal belongings like a purse or cell phone

Present Age Ministries helps these girls in need.  They have a holistic approach to helping and assess the needs of the girls in the following agreas:

• ·         Medical
• ·         Emotional & Psychological
• ·         Educational
• ·         Relational
• ·         Spiritual

The is also a national hotline to report concerns or get help – Human Trafficking Resource Center           1-888-373-7888

Present Age Ministries can be contacted at www.PresentAgeMinistries.org

February 7th, 2017 Better Sleep part 2

Feb 7^th

Our Feb 7^th meeting was an continuation of a meeting from last year.  It featured Kristin Daley, Ph.D. of Southeast Psych.  She started her career working in sleep medicine, and has worked in sleep medicine while completing her masters and her doctorate. She is one of approximately 200 psychologists who have completed certification in behavioral sleep medicine, and is trained to work with sleep disorders across the age spectrum.  

Kristin took us through all the factors in sleep.  Everyone wants to know what is their magic sleep number. 
Each person has their own ‘metabolism’ for sleep.  Sleep medicine professionals believe the average adult needs 7 hours of sleep but the national sleep foundation believes average adults need 7-8 hours.  Each person is different and there are some that only need 5 hours of sleep.  How do you determine how much you need – track how long you are sleeping over a 2 week period and determine the average.  You don’t have to get too detailed, you can just log what time you go to bed and what time you get out.  Age, gender, activity level all have impact on sleep and the ability to sleep.  You want to match the bed time to the sleep time, so that you have very little time in bed when you are not asleep. 

Our body works on a clock system – circadian rhythms and the brain waves while you sleep are a big symphony.  During the slow waves your brain is actually cleaning itself, this happens the first third of your sleep time.  The brain is flooded with spinal fluid which is critical to brain health.  There is a belief that reduced slow wave time has a direct correlation with dementia.
The middle third of the night your brain waves look like when your eyes are open and you are awake.  This is the time you dream and process emotions.  This is where memories are made permanent, you expunge unnecessary information and where you work through emotions, including trauma. 
To ensure your body clock stays on schedule you want to ensure your bedtime and wake up time stay consistent.  Everyday you should be going to bed around the same hour +/- 1 hour and same for waking up. 
Kristen also shared details on what we can do during the day to ensure a good night sleep:

• Dark room – light impacts sleep, use a flashlight if you have to get up to go to the restroom, NOT night lights. 
• Cool room
• You need 30 mins every day of unfiltered sunlight to produce serotonin as serotonin turns into melatonin, so if you lack in serotonin you will lack in melatonin.  She recommends being outside without sunglasses before 11am or after 3pm, for a total of 30 minutes. 
•  Do not use anything with a backlight 2 hours before bed – including your iphone, computer, tablets and newer Kindles.
• Read a paper book or an old fashion Kindle
• Short burst of cardio during the day will aide in sleeping due to the release of dopamine and reduce cortisol levels.  You need about 4-5 total minutes of heart pumping cardio – goes back to Caveman days when we encountered fight or flight every day. 
• If you are going to exercise at night do it about 2 hours before bed
• If you take a nap do it for NO longer than 30 mins, it draws away from your sleep at night
• Even teenagers need to go to bed and wake up about the same time everyday – you can allow them short naps but keeping them on schedule will only improve their ability to stay focused throughout the day
• The temperature in your room needs to be between 65-67 degrees, you can be bundled up from your neck to your toes but the key is to keep your head cool. 

Another key is food consumption.  You need carbohydrates but not too close to bedtime.  You need about 30 total grams of carbs during the day, but having carbs too close to bedtime will impact your sleep, this includes beer and wine.

Another item to ensure a good night sleep is ensuring you feel safe.  Your brain will not let you sleep unless you are feeling safe.  Your brain defines safety by the following:

1.      Consistent sound (this is a safe place) utilizing white noise is recommended. 

2.      Feel of the bed, checking sheets and blankets is your brain checking in

3.      Smell – smelling something familiar, however a specific scent will not help you sleep, however your pillow which smells like you will

Kristen recommended that you have to be friends with everything in your head.  You need your brain to not be in fear and key up the rest of your body to fight off ‘predators’  To help clear your head she recommends a bullet diary, bullet points to drain out the ‘ambiguity’ bucket. 

She reminded us to never look at a clock, your bedroom needs to be a place where it is okay to be out of control.  Natural sleep is better than sleep by medicine. 

Women and men have different sleep needs  and you have to find your rhythm. 

These same guidelines should be used for children, including babies.  Set up their rooms without night light.  She recommended the Cloud B sleep turtle or lady bug.  You can also put a night light on a timer to help with when it is okay for children to get out of bed.

Please also refer back to our notes from the previous meeting on April 12, 2016.

Secrets for Better Sleep April 12, 2016

Sleep – it is something that we all need but can be so elusive.  Our last meeting featured Kristin Daley, Ph.D. of Southeast Psych.  She started her career working in sleep medicine, and has worked in sleep medicine while completing her masters and her doctorate. She is one of approximately 200 psychologists who have completed certification in behavioral sleep medicine, and is trained to work with sleep disorders across the age spectrum.  

Kristin spoke to us about all the factors to make sleep happen.  So many people struggle with sleep, it is something we do not consciously control, the harder you fight for it most likely the harder it is to come by.  With all of the new sleep tracking technology she is seeing more ‘FitBit induced insomnia’  The more you measure it the worse it gets.  

Did you know that all animals require being unconscious, and how long you sleep and when you sleep is all dependent upon where you are in the food chain?  Animals lower in the food chain are more nocturnal and animals higher in the food chain are night sleepers. 

Each person has their own ‘metabolism’ for sleep.  Sleep medicine professionals believe the average adult needs 7 hours of sleep but the national sleep foundation believes average adults need 7-8 hours.  Each person is different and there are some that only need 5 hours of sleep.  How do you determine how much you need – track how long you are sleeping over a 2 week period and determine the average.  You don’t have to get too detailed, you can just log what time you go to bed and what time you get out.

Our body works on a clock system – circadian rhythms and the brain waves while you sleep are a big symphony.  During the slow waves your brain is actually cleaning itself, this happens the first third of your sleep time.  This time is very important and the belief is this time period will help protect you from dementia. 

The middle third of the night your brain waves look like when your eyes are open and you are awake.  This is the time you dream and process emotions.

The final 3^rd during REM humans have a mechanism to keep us asleep, unlike a dog when they are in REM they look like they are chasing someone.  Our bodies know to turn this mechanism and REM off about 15 minutes prior to waking which is why it is so important to have a consistent wake time, so your body knows when to turn off REM. 

To be able to fall asleep your brain needs to know that it is okay to turn off and be unconscious.  You have to feel safe.  Other pieces of the sleep puzzle are:

• Dark room – light impacts sleep, use a flashlight if you have to get up to go to the restroom, NOT night lights. 
• Cool room
• You need 30 mins every day of unfiltered sunlight to produce serotonin as serotonin turns into melatonin, so if you lack in serotonin you will lack in melatonin
•  Do not use anything with a backlight 2 hours before bed – including your iphone, computer, tablets and newer Kindles.
• Read a paper book or an old fashion Kindle
• Short burst of cardio during the day will aide in sleeping due to the release of dopamine and reduce cortisol levels.  You need about 4-5 total minutes of heart pumping cardio – goes back to Caveman days when we encountered fight or flight every day. 
• If you are going to exercise at night do it about 2 hours before bed
• If you take a nap do it for NO longer than 30 mins, it draws away from your sleep at night
• Even teenagers need to go to bed and wake up about the same time everyday – you can allow them short naps but keeping them on schedule will only improve their ability to stay focused throughout the day

The ritual of getting ready for bed is as important as the checklist above.  Having the triggers that tell your brain it is time to go to bed.  The scent of your pillow, sound and touch are all pieces of the puzzle.  Using a white noise machine that has a constant fast repeating sound can enable you to fall asleep and stay asleep.  Doing the same things every night reinforce sleep. 

For those that wake up in the middle of night Kristin gave us these tips:

• Do not relocate – it will awaken your brain
• Do not turn on lights
•  Don’t check the time – move your alarm clock some place where you can’t see it (the light will also impact your sleep)

Your bed needs to be a nice place, some place you want to go to sleep so if you can fall asleep on the couch but when you move to the bed you are wide awake you need to examine your sleep arraignments and adjust.  

For many people the hardest part of going to sleep is turning the chatter off in your brain.  Kristin said that you must regularly listen to that chatter or you will not be able to turn the chatter off.  If you are always thinking of the things you need to do then make a list before bed, then your brain will feel like you have attended to it.  You have to train your brain that you are taking care of the chatter for it to turn off and allow you to go unconscious and be rejuvenated.   

November 11, 2015 - Common Bra Blunders

Common Bra Blunders

Ensuring that you are wearing the proper bra is critical as bra’s are the foundation to any wardrobe and having the best fit will ensure you are comfortable in your clothes.  For our November meeting we learned from Brooke and Carly from Nordstrom’s the common blunders women make when it comes to wearing and caring bras.

We covered three critical areas – Fit, Cup and strap/coverage style

Fit

Breast tissue actually goes back to under your armpit and ensuring you have the proper fit with your bra will ensure you do not have ‘angel wings’ when wearing a bra.  Making sure the fit covers all of the breast tissue will eliminate those ‘angel wings’.  If you wear a bra with an underwire the wire should actually be about halfway through the armpit.

The band around your chest needs to be snug, you don’t want to be able to pull the band out in the back and get your hand in it.  You also don’t want the band to be painful.  For new bra’s you should expect the band to be somewhat uncomfortable as bras are similar to shoes and take time to you break in, they will mold to your body over time. 

Key points to look at when you are trying on bras is to ensure the wire doesn’t bow up on the bottom, the strap in the back isn’t too high or low – you want it in the middle of your back.  You will always have a little back overhang with a bra as a bra is pulling in and holding the tissue up.

If you have rubbing at the bottom of the bra it is the wrong fit or the lining on the bra is not working for your body type.

Cup/Coverage Style

Cups sizes are like pant sizes – it doesn’t matter what the size is you want it to be the correct fit, pull you up and in.  A proper sized bra will relieve tension from your back.  If you have  gapping in the cup area then your might have a size that is too big or too small, or the style of cup is wrong for your body.  There are soft cups that are lined that will guard against the ‘peep show’ so if you prefer a soft cup don’t be afraid to try one on. 

The demi cup style doesn’t work for everyone- if you’ve had work done then this is the style for you as you are more likely to be equal sized on both sides. 

A bra with a thicker back will give you more support.  Fuller coverage bra is fuller on the bottom coverage. 

Straps should be pulled tight but should not indent your shoulders or leave marks.  If they are too tight you might see the band popping up or if you have gapping in the cup area you might need to tighten the straps. 

So if you go to Nordstorms for a bra fitting this is what you should expect -

The fitter will measure you either with or without a bra on, they will have you inhale and exhale and at the inhale they will determine your band size.  Once they have a band size then they will utilize the fit bra, which is a soft cupped bra as that is the easiest type of bra to determine if the type of bra fits properly. 

Once they have options the fitter will help you determine style and will ensure that the buckle in the back is where it needs to be and then they will check the straps.  Understanding what color or type of bra you want (t-shirt, nude, non-lace etc.) can help the fitter but if you don’t know they will take the time to help you figure it out. 

So when should you be fitted for a bra?  Anytime you have major weight loss or weight gain and especially when you have stopped nursing and then every couple of years. 

For pre-teen girls you want to start in a bralette and then you can move to a more classic bra once they begin to round out.  For girls that are developing you want to have them fitted more often depending on how fast they are growing. 

How should you care for you bras?  The life of a bra is about 6 months, yes 6 months.  They recommend that you wash your bra in the gentle cycle with gentle detergent and then lay flat to dry or hang by the middle, if you hang by one strap that side will begin to stretch out.  The team recommends you have 3 bras at a minimum – one to wear, one that is being washed and one to have on hand if needed. 

You only need to wash your bras about every three wears UNLESS you get really sweaty in the bra then wash it more often so you do not have bacteria growing. 

For those that have been touched by breast cancer Nordstroms has certified fitters that can help you with prosthetics.  They can help you with the right form and then you can wear any kind of bra.  It is recommended that you make an appointment for this type of fitting to ensure the certified fitter is there.  Nordstorms will sew in pockets for the prosthetic at no charge and will also help file your insurance.  

Brooke Self
Department Manager
Lingerie/Women's Active-Swim
Nordstrom Southpark 750
704.442.6000 ext. 1249
brooke.self@nordstrom.com
 

April 14th Meeting Notes

Better than Couponing – Getting Started with Credit Card Rewards
 

Tony Mecia and Nick Felten

Tony and Nick have made credit card rewards work for them and their families.  They both have researched and learned to maximize how to get the most out of all the different credit card reward programs that are available and they shared their tips and tricks with us.

When looking at reward programs you can create master spreadsheets to track all the different programs or if you don’t want to be that involved then focus on a cash back card.   

The one card you need is Cashback card that gives you at a minimum 2%.  They recommended the Citi Double Cash – where you get 1% when you charge and 1% when you pay or the Fidelity Amex.

If you want miles then they recommend the Capital One Adventure – where you apply a cash rebate to travel purchases.

From an airline card perspective most major airlines have a card program.   

There are pros and cons to all of them:

Cons – Airline miles can be hard to use with blackout dates and limited availability.  Also, many of them have annual fees.  If you have airline miles to use they recommend planning that trip as early as you can to take advantage of the best options, most airlines open the redemption window around 300 or so days prior. 

Pros – miles are valuable and can be used to your advantage.  

One of the best miles programs is the British Airways card (partner to American/USairways)– but only redeem it for domestic travel, the redemption program is based on distance based so you can get short hops from CLT easily.

Hotel Cards offer easier redemption.  Many will give you status for the hotel chain so you receive perks when you check in.  Citi Hilton Reserve is a good option in this category. 

Many banks also have reward programs recommended programs are:

1. Amex Membership Rewards
2. Citi Thank You
3. Chase Ultimate Rewards
4. Chase Sapphire Rewards

Strategies to Maximize bonuses

1 – Sign up bonus, spend the amount necessary to get the bonus, move spending from cash or checks to cards, including bills

2 – Add your spouse as an authorized user – authorized users do not have to submit a credit check

3 – Book as soon as you can for airline miles

4 – Max out the category bonuses if the card has them – use post it notes to note what card to use where

5 – Pretend to book a trip with points to determine how many you would need and to see availability

6 – Use Wikipedia to find out where airlines fly, look under the airports name 

Pitfalls

If you carry a balance or do not pay on time do not use these strategies, focus on paying off your debits

Your credit score will temporarily be impacted

Annual fees – sometimes you can cancel before the annual fee is imposed but check to ensure you do not lose the points

Keeping track of multiple cards and multiple payments can be hard

Use a site to help you keep track of your award programs – awardwallet.com – it is a point’s aggregator to help you track what you have.

Keep your cards active, only need to make 1 purchase every couple of months.

 

There are many portals available where you can double points – check the rewards program sites for information on these

Be cautious of what bloggers recommend, sometimes they receive referral bonuses for sending customers to reward programs.