March Meeting: 365 Nights, A Memoir of Intimacy

Charla Muller was our March guest. The author of 365 Nights, A Memoir of Intimacy, which chronicles the year that she promised her husband sex every night for a year as a gift for his 40th birthday, and the stronger marriage that resulted as they made intimacy a priority. After the year was over, Charla met a book agent who encouraged her to write the story about the memorable year. When the book was published, she was interviewed on Oprah, Today Show, The View, and NY Times, among others. She shared with us her "Five Lessons Learned" as a result of her "year" and the resulting media attention.

1. Intention is Everything: Charla read an article once that said that if you could take a snapshot of your day, you would see what is most important in your life. Before "the year," her snapshot would have included everything except her husband. Part of what inspired her gift idea was that she wanted to make her husband the center of that snapshot again; intimacy was a way of having a meaningful connection.

2. Why Not Me?: When Charla's book editor first approached her about writing the book, Charla didn't see herself as the kind of person who could write that book. However, she discovered that it is okay to dream big and have big things happen to you. We can let so many outside things define who we are supposed to be (i.e. body image, social expectations) that we are easily convinced that we can't accomplish our dreams.

3. Boldness with Balance: Her husband agreed to let her write the book with the counsel that she write a book that would honor marriage and their faith. His counsel became Charla's mission statement and anchored her decision-making in determining what was appropriate to share in the book and what should remain between the two of them.

4. We All Need to Have Our A Team: The "A Team" is our list of go-to people, the ones who will help us to handle the hard parts. We need to surround ourselves with affirming people and not with "life-suckers." At the same time, we need to be affirming people and not "life-suckers" too.

5. Kindness Counts: After enduring snide comments and glib remarks, Charla learned how powerful words can be and resolved to improver her own communication as well. During "the year" Charla and her husband also learned how powerful kindness is in helping intimacy, that it is easier to want to be intimate after doing thoughtful things for each other outside the bedroom. Charla enjoyed the daily kindness that existed in their marriage and loved being the center of her husband's attention, and it was something she wanted to maintain after "the year" was over.

Samaritan's Feet

The Philanthropy Committee organized a Saturday morning service project for GSGC members and families at Samaritan's Feet. Samaritan's Feet is a non-profit group that collects new shoes and distributes them to children in need both locally and globally. We brought shoes and checks to support their cause and we also helped to prepare shoes to be shipped. We estimated that we processed 315 pairs of shoes.

We learned that for $10, the organization can make and ship a pair of shoes to a child in need. If you are interested in supporting this organization, Kim Gordon will continue to collect checks until the March meeting, so please consider giving.

Thank you to all those who participated and for the Philanthropy Committee for organizing the event!

T. Reid and Company

Our February meeting featured the some of the finest talents at the T. Reid Salon: Tonya Reid (owner), Kim Schneider (esthetician), and Noel Lance (stylist). They shared with us tips and suggestions for looking your best.

Kim Schneider, an esthetician (skin care specialist), answered several questions about skin care. The foundation for skin care is in the daily routine which should include three steps: cleanse, light exfoliation, hydration, and sunscreen. Any care you give should include more than just your face; make sure you are treating your neck and chest area as well as these areas are also susceptible to sun damage and can show age too. Good skin care begins at any age, so it isn't too early to encourage teens and kids to start good skin habits too. Using good products can make a difference in how effective the daily routine is, and Kim is happy to advise as to what products are best for your skin.

For more intensive repair, Kim highlighted the benefits of a chemical peel, which helps to reveal radiant new layers of skin that are buried underneath layers of older skin. Chemical peels are best done in the fall and spring when weather is less intense, and despite the name, don't hurt (though they might tingle a little). You will usually notice a nice glow immediately after the peel and then have some flaking three days later (something to keep in mind if you are getting ready for a big event). Microderm abrasion is another option for intense exfoliation on the face. The microderm abrasion device blasts the skin with crystals and the sucks up the dead skin, revealing new layers of skin.

Kim addressed other problems areas such as dark circles under you eyes and weak lashes. "Total Eye" is a product that repairs and conceals dark circles; it is worn during the day as part of your day routine. "Intensive Eye Repair" also helps with dark circles and it is worn at night. As for weak lashes, there is a prescription available for strengthening lashes, and T. Reid is considering carrying a similar mascara in their boutique. Kim also recommended lightly covering lashes with Vaseline at night to strengthen lashes. If you are preparing for a big event and need quick results, Tonya recommended an oxygen facial, where the face is plumped with oxygen to firm skin. In general, be careful not to overdo skin treatments, particularly treatments at home.

As for hair, Tonya and Noah gave several tips about hair care and styling. Tonya counseled that is always better to do it right first, particularly with color. It is far more expensive to do corrective color than the initial treatment, so choose wisely when you have someone color your hair. If it is time to go gray, she recommended doing it gracefully over a couple of years instead of right away. She works in lowlights and eventually brings out the sophisticated silver look.

Dry hair is common in the winter because you battle constant temperature changes, so using a moisturizing shampoo can help. Adding a smoothing agent like the Bamboo Smooth Kendi Oil (Dry Oil Mist) that she gave to Ellen Yingling can help with managing frizz. Proper hair drying technique can also help with frizz control. As Tonya said, a cat doesn't like it's fur brushed the wrong way and neither does your hair respond well when it is brushed up, so make sure to brush it down when you are drying. Power dry your hair to 80% dry and then use a ceramic round brush to finish the dry and style. If you have a concentrator tool for your dryer, use it as it will help to concentrate the hot air on the hair. As with skin, using good tools will improve your results. If your dryer is older than two years, it may not be heating your hair properly which can result in damage, so it is worth replacing. High quality flat irons, curing irons, and round brushes (look for a ceramic one with a sealed handle) can also produce pleasing results while protecting your hair from damage.

Tonya offered some tips for on-the-go styling, such as using an uplifting root blaster to freshen up a day-old style and give it volume. Pull back pieces in the front and pin in the back at the top of the crown for a more finished style (see Sarah Rowe's hair above). Looking for a fun option for your usual ponytail? For Michelle's look, Tonya added a cute braid across the front and then pulled the rest of the hair back into a trendy pigtail look. Noah also talked about styling a loose curl with a round brush. The brush size that you use will affect how tight the curl will be (the larger the brush, the looser the curl). Roll the hair onto the ceramic brush, heat it with the blow dryer, blast it with the cool shot (if you have that button), and then carefully twist the hair out of the dryer.

A darling green house on East Blvd, T. Reid Salon is a full service salon and spa as well as a boutique. Tonya, Noel, and Kim are available for appointments. Call 704-377-1511 or find them at www.treidandcompany.com.

Holiday Appetizers

Beverly McLaughlin of Beverly’s Foods showed us some easy ways to wow your guests at your next holiday parties (and maybe even keep them healthy). A vegetarian, Beverly is a 4^th generation vendor at the Mecklenburg County Market who uses local produce to create her products. She showed us how to make Lentil Walnut Pate on Puffed Pastry, Kalamata Olive Pinwheels, and Tofu Lettuce Wraps.

Lentil Walnut Pate on Puffed Pastry

Ingredients:

Puffed pastry dough (look for it in the freezer section)

Lentil Walnut Pate (made by Beverly, but you can use any topping)Cherry TomatoesParsley

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Spray a cookie sheet and line with parchment paper. Unroll the slightly thawed puffed pastry dough. Using a cookie cutter (she used the lid of a spice jar), cut the dough into round pieces about the size of a large cracker. Put the round pieces on the cookie sheet. Spray a second piece of parchment paper and put it on top of the pastry circles and then put another cookie sheet on top of the second piece of parchment paper, sandwiching the dough between two cookie sheets. The weight of the second cookie sheet prevents the puffed pastry from puffing too high. Bake for 10-15 minutes (8 minutes if you are using a convection oven) until slightly golden. Allow to cool and then top with pate and quartered cherry tomatoes.

Kalamata Olive Pinwheels

Kalamata Olive Spread (made by Beverly, or use another filling that doesn’t use mayonnaise) Puffed pastry dough

Unroll the slightly thawed pastry dough and trim about a strip of dough about an inch wide from the sheet. Spread the kalamata olive spread in a thin layer on the dough. Roll the dough back into a log and wrap it with the parchment paper it was packaged in, and place it in the freezer for a couple of hours (you can also make this up to a month in advance and keep it in the freezer; let it rest for an hour on the counter until it is soft enough to slice). When you are ready to cook the pinwheels, preheat the oven at 350 degrees. Spray a cookie sheet with not stick spray and line with parchment paper. Cut ¼ of an inch slices and put the slices on the cookie sheet, making up to 20 per log. Bake the pinwheels for 10 minutes or until slightly golden. Serve warm.

Tofu Lettuce Wraps

Bibb lettuce (leaves about the size of your palm are perfect for individually-sized wraps)Extra firm tofu roasted in hoisin sauce (coat tofu in hoisin and toast in oven at 350 degrees for 30-40 minutes)Cooked rice noodles, choppedCarmelized onions (onions sautéed to a darker complexion)Fresh red peppers, choppedFlat leaf parsley or cilantro

Combine the tofu, rice noodles, onions, red peppers, and parsley into a bowl. Fill the lettuce leaf with a couple of tablespoons of filling and plate on a large, flat platter so that the wraps can lie side by side. Serve with a vinaigrette, soy sauce, or hoisin sauce.

Halloween at Ethan Court

Thank you to Halloween Committee and all those who helped with our Halloween party this year. We all had a great time and really appreciate your efforts.

Atherton Mill

Lynn Caldwell, manager of Atherton Mill, shared with us the ins and outs of finding local produce and bringing it to your table. A native of Charlotte, she found her green Zen in Seattle where she apprenticed at a farm. Bringing her fresh ideas back to Charlotte, Lynn started a “tailgate market”, selling fresh produce from the back of a truck. The concept eventually turned into Atherton Mill, a Charlotte market dedicated to the idea of selling locally produced products. Most of the products sold at Atherton Mill are “producer only” in that they are sold by the people who grew/made them. The Mill offers a variety of products with the intent of giving the shopper a market-like selection of the essentials and more.

What are the advantages of eating local? Reduced carbon foot print, having a relationship with the people who produce what you eat, and supporting the local economy are nice ideas, but amazingly fresh produce is the real bonus. Even though the market sells what is in season, there is always food available at the Mill. Poultry, seafood, sweets, chocolates, bread, cheese, grains, rice, pancake mixes, and of course fresh fruits and veggies are just a small selection of what is available. Lynn’s definition of a local producer is someone who can have a relationship with their customer and uses a product that is created locally.  Lynn challenged us to be aware of where our food comes from, how it is produced, who is affected by the way it is produced, and in general be more conscious about what we put in our bodies.

Looking for a place to let someone else cook “local” for you? Check out Halycon, Savor on Morehead, Fern, Bistro La Bon, Carpe Diem, Zada Jane’s, Passion 8 Bistro, Barrington’s, and Good Food on Montford. You can also check out Lynn on WFAE’s WFAEats blog.

Real local produce: tomatoes from Erin's garden. Thanks Erin for hosting!

Fashion Night: September 2011 Meeting

Karen Bailey (Customer Relations Manager), L. Jackson (Personal Stylist/ Certified Lingerie Fitter) and Arden Wilkinson (Salesperson), all from Nordstrom’s, gave us the latest in women’s fall fashion and general fashion tips. The fall trends for 2011 are:

• ·        Longer Lengths (skirts that hit in the mid calf area)
• ·        Retro 70’s Separates
• ·        Exotic Skins
• ·        Bold Color Mixes (colored jeans)
• ·        Leather Sportswear
• ·        Shift Dresses
• ·        Capes
• ·        Faux Fur
• ·        Anything Animal
• ·        Heritage Plaids

L. and Arden used three models, Michelle Smolowitz, Harriet Gatter, and Leslie Lowery, to demonstrate a few of these looks.

To start, the Nordstrom ladies said that there are two things women wear incorrectly: jeans and bras. Jeans should be tight, tighter than you would expect as they will relax after you wear and wash them (if they fit, try the next size down). Arden recommended doing lunges and squats while wearing the jeans to get them to that perfect fit. 

In general jeans have a higher rise this season and “flares” are in. If you have awkward bulges coming out of your jeans, chances are you are not wearing the right rise. L. showed her Cookie Johnson jeans that were designed for a curvier shape. 

If you have a shorter stride, go with a low rise; a longer torso should wear a higher rise. As for the jean’s wash, if you have larger thighs, go with a clean wash as textured wash and/or “whiskers” (lines where the jeans crease) will accentuate thighs. 

Picking the right shoe is an important part of wearing jeans. If you are wearing flares, go with a heel particularly if you are short. Boot cut and Flare jeans generally need to be hemmed to fit you, so pick your shoe’s height when you have it hemmed (the hem should skim the floor, and make sure the tailor pays attention to any detailing in the hem). A straight or skinny jean looks great cuffed and worn with a flat shoe, or you can tuck skinny jeans into a rider (knee length) boot (don’t wear anything but a skinny with boots as it will bulge awkwardly). As for washing jeans, use something similar to Drift- a petroleum free detergent. Hang jeans to dry and wash them inside out.

As for tops, look for silky blouses with scarves, boxy tops (something your husband might wear) with an added belt at the waist for a feminine touch. 

Belts are generally specific to whether they are worn on the pants or around the waist on a shirt (this variety usually has elastic banding and can be tailored); if you don’t know the difference, make sure to ask! Tan belts are versatile and belts don’t necessarily need to match shoes. Belts can make the difference between a tailored, feminine look and a pregnancy top. 

Go the extra mile with accessories, details like faux fur, jewelery, and scarves, and don’t be afraid of a little color.

As for outer ware, capes are a lovely choice this season, just make sure they fit and they are the right color. 

The Nordstrom ladies also highly recommended a bra fitting session. Women often buy band sizes that are too big and cup sizes that are too small. Bra fittings and sessions with personal stylists are free.

Contact information:

L. Jackson: 704-442-6000 ext 1451, lanaysha.b.jackson@nordstrom.com

Arden Wilkinson: 704-442-6000 ext 1320, arden.e.wilkinson@nordstrom.com